The Lies We Lie.

"I am a man until I'm a man no more." - Anonymous

The above quote is one I believe to be free of our every day hobby; lies. The quote states, that the man referring to himself, no longer exists as his existence perishes from everyone's eyes. Now the unstated truth, is that this man also dooms himself as he no longer acquires what made him a man in the first place. Many can be said from this quote, but it's one I happen to find very interesting. However, lets get back to where we were heading; lies.

Stereotyping lies into a few categories as we all can understand what lies are and we draw the lines to what the truth may be, as it only differs from deceit by a very thin line. Some may find themselves excusing of not telling the truth is NOT lying, but draw the line there bud, cause you definitely ARE. A majority however prefer not to waste time and avoid unnecessary conversation. Somehow you must be guessing what the quote has to do with all of this; rest assured, we'll get to that soon enough.

1. White isn't always pure.

The "white lie", as many term it, is just a way of deviating away from socializing conversations and "small talk". These "mice" lies arise when there is discomfort in the air between converses, and the need to leave or deviate arises. "How are you?" and the answer would be, yes you guessed it, "Fine." Now, many say that this is a lie that doesn't hurt, so what the hell? Well, I say, you're full of poppycock. White isn't always pure and you know it. You say you're fine when someone out there truly want's to know how you are, you say you've eaten to someone that wants to open up to you over a cup of coffee. Why lie, when you actually have a mouth, ten fingers, a brain, body language and symbols to convey your sorrows or joy?

2. The untold truth

"I'm not lying, I'm simply not saying anything right now"  DOES NOT IN ANY WAY differ from "I lied, so what?". Try your best to justify your way out of this one, when you know you're always gonna lose the war. The truth being untold for now only grows the fire bigger. As it grows, you tend to burn together with it's impeccable implosion that occurs soon after the untold, becomes the told-by-someone-else.

3. Last but not least, the Deceit

The most painful of lies, if I may say so myself. You can never see it coming your way, and that's what stings the most. The lie, the betrayal, the pain. Just like your friend, who's sitting right beside you, with the pair Aces in his hand, raises you and encourages you to call his win. This may not sound much, but envision it as a metaphor, and you might just see the Royal Flush you're holding.

These are mainly the lies that I've come across, and every other lie is just one part of these. I'm not saying I've never lied all my life. In fact, I still am, and I still will be. I will not name myself to be a saint, nor will I name anyone to be a sinner. Lying is painful to begin with, many would agree to that. Lie for what matters and weigh in consequences to those lies. The pain may remain, but be sure you go 10 years away to look back at it as a lesson worth your life.

"I'm a man till I'm a man no more," is something I suggest we should apply to; as I believe that the more lies you throw, the less of a man you become.

- The Ugly Retard

She will be loved.

She always glittered in his eyes, she always smiled sparkling champagne, intoxicating him and driving him crazy. Yes, she was the one he was so crazy about, and yes, he is gonna make it official tonight. He saw her from a far, in her orange evening gown, at the dinner party his friend was hosting his son's birthday. It was a full moon, and she was right there, a few feet away from his sight. Holding a bouquet of flowers and mildly drenched in sweat, he stood there; stunned looking at her gorgeous eyes, her sweet smile, just walking towards him. He calmed himself, pulled himself together. She came close, he stood still. She came closer, staring him down with her smile, and he stood still. She came to him, and said:

"Hey Max,"
"I love you," he replied.

Now, tables turned. She was stuck, not knowing what to do, what to say. Even Max jammed up. Many were looking, wondering what was going on, and how he uttered those words. He dropped the bouquet and just ran away, leaving the party, but most importantly, leaving her. She just walked to her sister, crying, and regretting what happened. But why the regret? Why the sadness? Why so much of commotion from a love confession?

University of Purdue was where everyone was at, and the class of 07'ers were the BOMB! The babes were just delicious from afar, the hunks were nothing less and the parties rocked all summer of 07. That was also the year of young Max ending his senior year at Purdue. Being a frat man, he was of many ordeals. A Jack of all trades sorta speak. Graduating top of his class of Engineering Bachelors with Honors, he was also the KING of every party taken place in the Gamma House! More can be said about Max "The Machine" Mitchell, but let's get back to where were just now.

The last few days in Purdue were just sucky, from all the exams, annoying photo sessions and grad prep. As soon as exams were done, Max planned out one of the most major parties the Gamma House,no wait, the whole of Purdue would ever see! The blueprints were all out, the budget was all set, the contacts were pulled in, and the crowd, well, anyone's welcome to a Gamma House frat party! Max began plans with Bryan and Tank. Bryan and Tank are also graduating alongside Max, with not-so awesome grades, when compared to Max of course.

Finally, graduation. Speeches given, and Max was honored as the valedictorian; top of his class. The other dudes of his class were stoked, but why? Not exactly because their fellow class man had passed with honors. The excitement mainly arose due to the fact that the party, well, let's just it ain't gonna be any less than AWESOME!

After a week of planning at the Gamma House, it was all set. These dudes were given a week to check out of the frat, and looks like they put it to pretty good use. Now, every party planner should always have two things in mind; one, the Check List and two, the Guest List. You don't wanna run outta booze at midst of your party now, would ya? At the same time, an old perv or a geek dude ain't gonna heat the party up any further that it being in a freezer. Max, of course, had all this covered. Experience from all the parties he planned in the past, well, lets just say if he was an old man with gray hair to show how much experience he has, he would be Richard Gere.

There was one thing bugging him though, the invite to "her". Megan Donohue, the so-called "girl next door". Inviting her wouldn't be a problem, but she was known for one thing, and one thing only; her enormous knowledge. She was that classic geek chick; nerdy glasses, retainers and all that. Why was he inviting her in the first place? Well, she actually saved his ass a couple of times on test papers and subjects, by tutoring. His intelligence being threatened, actually turned into an affection, a crush towards this not-so foxy chick.

"But hey, what the heck?!"

The thought in his mind as he sends out the invite to his crush. Invite sent, and all that was left was " The Wait". No reply. Disappointed and frustrated, Max just went about to get the prep done for the party. The theme; Judgement Day!

Judgment Day was set, and ready for shit to go down! People started coming in the Gamma House, and everyone just loved the vibe. Hard rock playing the back, cracking noises that would occur at certain periods of time and sudden shakes from the ground, courtesy of the Portable Electromagnetic Tectonic Generator; or as they like to call it, PET-G. You got your theme set out, now where the hell's the host? And.........BOOM! He comes blasting outta his window, diving straight into the pool outside. A man of great impression, he is.

Followed by a huge SPLASH of course, he swims himself out of the pool and into a riot of friends, chanting his name as they carry him with pride. The party was lit with bright lights and beer cans were never-ending all night long! It looked to be a fun last night for Max, but there was always that one tiny pinch deep down in his heart. How is he to release himself of the pain, of that tiny irritating pinch? Well, the answer just rang the doorbell. Max walks up the door, and to his surprise, it was HER.

Megan Donohue, the not-so-foxy "girl next door" finally decided to drop by.

"Meg, hey." Max sounded surprised.

"Hey Max. Sorry I didn't RSVP earlier, I wasn't planning on coming because I'm sorta not into these things." She replied.

"Hey come'on, it's cool. Just get in, and maybe I can get you something to drink, a cocktail or something?"

"Err, that would be great."

Max sits Megan down on the couch down the hall, as the party was going loud down at the backyard.

"Here you go." Max passes Megan her drink.

"It's one of my secret recipes. It's called The Green Screwdriver"

*laughs* "That sounds pretty creepy" Megan replied.

"Well it's nothing really, just a lighter Grasshopper"

"I've tried neither Max."

While all this small talk was going on, Max had a little thought in his mind. Maybe to ask her out or something before he leaves Purdue. He wanted to go out with her so badly, but maybe it's just the alcohol playing around with his hormones. As he was going to ask her, he realized something.

"Hey Meg, you okay?"

"Max *burp* I'm feeling a lil *burp* dizzy." Meg replied in a funny manner.

"Max, what's happening to me?"

"Oh shit! Meg, I think you're drunk. Maybe you would just wanna sleep off here."

"But Max, I just got here."

Max then remembered Megan had never drank any sort of alcohol at any amount. Max was in big trouble, but he was about to make things "better".

"Hey Meg, lemme take you to my room. Why don't you just lie down there until you feel okay to go?"

-to be continued-

the ugly r3tard

Love; Pain's evil twin.

Many consider falling in love one of the best things that could ever happen to them. And there are those who think the otherwise as well. But what separates both this groups? Why do they walk their separate paths? A man who falls in love today, may wake up feeling bored about it. A woman so lonely this moment might just end up tripping onto the guy of her dreams. Then what happens? In my personal opinion, LIFE happens.

That's just it. We fall in love. Get into this mesmerizing fantasy, that we are filled with flowers and butterflies, floating in joy and falling on spongy excitement. Illusions created that there would never be anymore prettier or dashing woman or man, respectively, that could ever come close to the other. There was never a thought coming cross anyone's mind, that maybe, just maybe, there's someone better. What if that was just yesterday? What if 3 months of joy, suddenly just turns into comfort? What if looking at the other, you feel NOTHING?

That's when Love's twin kicks in, and he's here to stay. Pain's his name, hurting being his game. When love is gone, that empty void left will immediately be filled by pain. Have you ever felt it? That one moment where you have no more love, you feel emptiness. Soon after, you feel this ache, and then a constant pain down your throat. Then you feel this impinging pain on your chest, like it's the end of the world. And then comes two different paths. The death; where you decide to no more endure this lifelong pain, and just end it a second's hurt. But then, there's always path number two; the bounce.

The bounce; happens when you fall down hard, really hard, until it hurts your whole body in and out, forcing you to push yourself back up and fight. The empty void left, will remain empty, no longer filled with pain. But at a price, of you pushing that one person out of your void completely!

I know many of you will agree completely, some partially, and a minor few will never. But can I ask you who the bad "guy" really is? Is it love or is it pain? Some may think this is a question of "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?". Don't look at it that way, as love exists as love and pain will exist as pain, not counting which came first. The co-exist with each other no matter how you look at life. There would be no love without pain, and no pain without love as well. No guy is gonna wake up bored with his girl, if there wasn't an argument during dinner last night. No girl is gonna trip on the guy of her dreams, if she didn't first walk out drunk from the guy who left her.

I prefer being in pain than being in love. The colorful butterflies and beautiful flowers; yea, they're worthwhile, but for how long? Till another just dumps cow dung all over it, or till you get sick and tired of painting the same picture day in day out? I feel Pain's the good guy, and Love made Pain the way he is right now. Pain didn't choose to be hated, but because he co-existed with Love, he had no choice. In order to create balance, he had to take the troubled path, and chose to be the way he is.

I am no big fan of Love herself, when all she ever did for me, was rip me apart and tore me to pieces. I'm sorta glad that happened, cause then came Pain. He was there all the while, and he made me realize something. As he remained, there was no reason for me to find Love. He taught me a lesson, to never see him again was what he preached. It was a simple equation actually. You fall in love, you get dumped. Endure pain, and think if you wanna feel it again. Staying away from love would be the best option by far.

But hey, what are we again?

We're humans; dumb, stupid, attention-seeking, emotionally unstable, heart-broken animals. We can't help staying away from being in love, no matter what. It's just how our blueprints were designed. Look's like we inherited too much from Eve when she was told that forbidden fruits were actually FORBIDDEN. We don't get to see ourselves make mistakes, as the "forbidden fruit" tastes so good, even if it only lasted for mere moments.

It all comes down to the nature of our being, how we came to be. After all, what are we but only human.

-tHe uGLy rEtArD-

She Will be Loved (Preview)

She always glittered in his eyes, she always smiled sparkling champagne, intoxicating him and driving him crazy. Yes, she was the one he was so crazy about, and yes, he is gonna make it official tonight. He saw her from a far, in her orange evening gown, at the dinner party his friend was hosting his son's birthday. It was a full moon, and she was right there, a few feet away from his sight. Holding a bouquet of flowers and mildly drenched in sweat, he stood there; stunned looking at her gorgeous eyes, her sweet smile, just walking towards him. He calmed himself, pulled himself together. She came close, he stood still. She came closer, staring him down with her smile, and he stood still. She came to him, and said:

"Hey Max,"
"I love you," he replied.

Now, tables turned. She was stuck, not knowing what to do, what to say. Even Max jammed up. Many were looking, wondering what was going on, and how he uttered those words. He dropped the bouquet and just ran away, leaving the party, but most importantly, leaving her. She just walked to her sister, crying, and regretting what happened. But why the regret? Why the sadness? Why so much of commotion from a love confession?

*This is just the beginning. Ready for the rest? Drop me a comment and the rest shall appear.

Your's truly,

the uGLy rEtArD

The Law of Attraction

The basic Law of Attraction (in Layman terms):

"Opposites attract!"

"Yin and Yang!"

 

According to the ever popular Wikipedia, the definition stated:

"blah blah blah...like attracts like...blah blah blah"

 

Have you ever wondered what the Law of Attraction is? Has it ever been a curious question that rose in your mind when you were in doubt of what makes a relationship tick?

I have always wondered on how things work, and how attraction exists between man and woman. I've been curious for some time, and I have asked people and based on personal experience I have came up with my own hypothesis, maybe a conclusion, on how the law actually plays it's part.

Some amongst us (hypocrites) may say, that they don't look for looks in their partner, but, and I quote; "it's what's on the inside that counts." What do I say to this; bullshit. No offense. There is no way that you would meet up with an old dude with wrinkles looking fat now, would you? And for the male; would you meet a 25 year old "hairy" woman with no dressing sense? Hence, step one: the first impression.

Establishing a first impression counts; big time. Whether you pull it off right or wrong, results in what comes after. To me basically, I dress my casual self with my Edwin mid-cuts, Tropicana Life jeans and maybe throw on a Giordano polo tee. I assure myself to get a nice clean shave before meeting up this special someone, not to mention smelling good to match. P.S: This description ain't always what I wear when I meet a "special someone".

Step two: The meet up. The environment, the setup, the music, the food. It all plays a small part; individually. Together, they actually can throw you off your path, or maybe show you the bright light that shines at the end of the dark road you travel in. It doesn't have to be exclusive, but knowing your partner's favorites are bonus points. 

Wise words from Sun Tzu's Art of War:

"If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles."

And now we move on to step 4: the conversation. Every word uttered must be taken notice of, to establish yourself of being a good listener. No lady or gentleman would like to be ignored on the first meet up. Keep the conversation going, whether about friends, family embarrassing moments; anything to avoid each other from falling asleep. Even a canned drink would be enough to last hours worth of conversation; believe me, I know.

These steps just help the attraction process, but what exactly composes the attraction? Opposites attract to some, and similarities to others. Pulling off the pure "good-guy" look ain't gonna get you anywhere, nor the "I'm-all-bad-boy" look neither. Showing off your cash flow might get you places, but not to where you're suppose to head to.

What I'm trying to say in this article, is that I don't attract as many as you think. I choose who I wanna attract, who I think are special. I am unique in my own way, but still an average dude amongst others; and it's just the way I like it. Attraction works as you put yourself as how you are. The steps above are just helping tools on what you can help yourself with.

P.S: I'm not setting an example, just being a curious cat.

-tHe UgLy rEtArD-

The Blue who bled RED!

Now god wanted a football match,
And to play it up in heaven,
But first he needed players,
And select his first eleven.

Georgie Best, big Brian Labone,
The legend Dixie Dean,
Alan Ball and Bobby Moore,
All made it in the team.

He needed one more player,
Some one who would be quick,
From up above he looked down,
And saw Rhys there in his kit.

So Rhys was taken up above,
God took him by the hand,
To play the game he loved so much,
Where sponsorship is banned.

There is no cheating either as,
God is the referee,
There are no mega wages,
And the transfers they are free.

The games are live on telly,
You don't have to subscribe,
The players all stay on their feet,
Cos no one takes a dive.

So Rhys plays now so happily,
To the angels in the crowd,
And every time he hits the net,
They roar his name so loud.

Have fun my little blue boy,
Your safe and in gods care,
Till its time for me to get my boots,
And join with you up there.

God bless Rhys.

5 years today.
You'll Never Walk Alone!
Rip Lil Man 

There's always a lil bit of something.

There's always something hidden between words, exchanged between an individual to another. Some might not mean a thing, yet some may be just a hint of how one is feeling, reasons of sadness or happiness. Words of sadness or anger doesn't always mean the same emotion; it might as well be the opposite, don't you think? Many don't find the significance of understanding true emotions portrayed in between speech and body language. A certain few among us actually look for these hidden "emotions", somewhat of an emotional leakage.


Try taking a second to think. For all you know, you may be doing the very same thing without realizing it! For all you know, you might just say that you're okay, cause that's what you want yourself to believe. But what is it that you're feeling? Try coming clean with yourself, and try taking off that mask you wear in front of many others, who believe what you say instead of what you feel. 


I started wondering about this, because I often portray these acts, and I realize it in a delayed manner. I never actually give much thought into my feelings, and put others' importance above mine. I'm not bragging, but many know who I am. I tried coming clean with myself, and yet I still can't stop myself. The fear of hurting someone close to me, someone loved and cared for, is always there. And so I put on a smile, take my walk.


"I'm fine. I'm okay." 


Saying these words may be the easiest thing; and that's why we chose to say this, instead of explaining the pain and trouble we are going through. Why burden someone with your pain? What's there to share when there's only pain and suffering? 


I put on a smile and take my walk. A smile so fake, heck, even I might just fall for it.

-tHe uGLy rEtArD-